So... Made my day... I am sitting at my computer at like 9 pm. But who gets on... Jeremy Slager! Mind you he is in Africa right.... It is like 3 am!! So I said I quick hi because I like the kid... end of story


I then went to Ecclesia... Our student led chapel...

couldn't have said it better myself: I never can

If you are familiar with Jeremy's blogs.... You know he has been wrestling with this whole "organized church" aspect for awhile... Don't quote me, but from what I have gathered his thoughts are as follows: The Church in America is corrupt; We suck at this Christianity thing; and "The Greatest single cause of atheism in the world today is Christians; who acknowledge Jesus with their lips and walk out the door and deny him by their lifestyle."

I as well have been investigating and contemplating this idea lately. I am not pointing fingers persay, I am apart of the "corporate church" as well, however, I am questioning the foundational aspects of it.

An awesome song has been brought to my attention regarding this. Becca, knowing I have been contemplating this aspect of religion, gave me these lyrics recently. I have never heard this song before, but I think the lyrics are dead on.

"Stained Glass Masquerade"

Is there anyone that fails?
Is there anyone that falls?
Am I the only one in church today feelin' so small?

Cause when I take a look around
Everybody seems so strong
I know they'll soon discover
That I don't belong

So I tuck it all away, like everything's okay
If I make them all believe it, maybe I'll believe it too
So with a painted grin, I play the part again
So everyone will see me the way that I see them

Are we happy plastic people
Under shiny plastic steeples
With walls around our weakness
And smiles to hide our pain
But if the invitation's open
To every heart that has been broken
Maybe then we close the curtain
On our stained glass masquerade

Is there anyone who's been there
Are there any hands to raise
Am I the only one who's traded
In the altar for a stage

The performance is convincing
And we know every line by heart
Only when no one is watching
Can we really fall apart

But would it set me free
If I dared to let you see
The truth behind the person
That you imagine me to be

Would your arms be open
Or would you walk away
Would the love of Jesus
Be enough to make you stay

***********************************************
Phenomenal, no? I don't know if I have came across/found/read/wrote a better dipiction...

Do some thinking... I know I am...

challenging ay?
good

_abe

the song I wrote, entitled: Finally a real song I can sing because verbal diarrhea is stupid and I hate it

Furthermore... an intriguing insight... well in my opinion ;)

Extending from my conversation with brett... We were just talking about worship songs... the songs in general... We discussed writing worship songs and how brett has written a few but he felt were not suitable for "corporate worship." I totally agree... I think in the forming of a "new song," it is more than just getting words that sound good together or creating a song that appeals to the masses... I think an authentic worship song comes from the heart... comes from the bottom of the soul... explains our passions... our struggles... our longings....

******Here Lies the Problem******

If I personally, were to write a song; an authentic, passionate, real song... From the depths of my soul... IT WOULD NOT BE PRETTY... literally.... It wouldn't "sound good." Most likely, it wouldn't resonate with anyone else.... This song would be dirty, it would wrestle with my thoughts, it would be real and it would most likely offend anyone who read it.... It would discuss my problems... my struggles... my dreams... my hopes... Performed: face the the ground... It would be filled with huge guitar riffs, full of distortion, pounding bass, slowly building, and building, and building, shaking the ground I am standing on: screaming at the top of my lungs... crying out... dancing... lots of dancing... jumping around... punching stuff... crying... shattering mirrors...

: To share that with a corporate body, oh the humility it would take, but oh the trust :

you see... That would be the only real song I could sing... that is real... that is what I feel inside... and the best thing is... It is Good.

I hope this made sense... If not... good... maybe you can relate or even better... maybe you can't. Figure out your own song.
More to come...

_abe

(p.s. I found out class was cancelled so I could finish what I wanted to say before I forgot)

Last night I just wanted to leave, frankly because I was tired of being in the dorm... So, I asked my friend Brett if he wanted to go get some coffee. He corgially (spellin?) accepted and away we walked... We shot the breeze for a while and then we began to talk about our lives and our beliefs and it ended up being mostly about our church experiences.

The conversation drifted towards worship.... (imagine that ;) ) and it definetly stayed there. The conversation we had was absolutely facinating. Brett is studying to get a Worship Arts Leadership degree or something like that... anyways... basically, he is studying to lead others in worship. It was just awesome to talk with him about something he is passionate about and something I am longing to be passionate about... At the end of the conversation on our way back to campus, we stumbled across the very subject I talked about in my previous posting... More than just having a time of "verbal diarrhea" (as brett classified it :) ) in worship... but really meditating on what you are singing... and more than just singing with your mouth, but singing with your heart...

All of a sudden I was undeniably preaching a sermon to brett..... I just kept going on theory, and what that would look like (authentic worship all of the time), and why we as Christians act this way.... Frankly I was just venting... and Brett got the brunt of it... But... It was excellent to get what I was feeling out into verbal, audible words....

That's all I have right now... actually I have a lot more which I will post in the near future... However... class is calling and beckening me to come...

_abe